I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
You have to summon your inner elephant
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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