is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
