New low: just hacked my moms facebook
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
