So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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