I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize