You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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