i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Randomize
