Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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