I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
