so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
