where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
