id be glad to
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
