Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
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