had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I need a burrito and a hug.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize