**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
