so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
