Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
