just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
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