you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Randomize
