I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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