Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
