if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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