Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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