So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
