Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
