Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Randomize
