Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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