Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
