The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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