Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
