he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
