sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
