i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
It was a blind-side dick pic.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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