Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
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