You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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