Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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