he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
is it fun? or sober?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
