I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Are we still banned from the library?
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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