it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Randomize
