she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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