I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Quick, to the slutcave!
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
