FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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