Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I FOUND THE LEGS
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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