My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
