Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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