Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
