Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
