i just google imaged poop.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
