doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
