OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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