It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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