I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize